Mary Had A Little Lamb

Perfectionist's Perfection

2009-08-23T08:55:00.000-07:00

"Virgo, the sixth sign of the zodiac, is also considered as the sign of critic or craftsman. Practical, modest, loving, helpful, active and fussy Virgo people are born between August 23-September 22. Its zodiac symbol is represented by a woman. Its ruling planet is mercury and Wednesday is its lucky day. A Virgo woman can be described as charming, witty, realistic, honest, organized, dedicated, helpful, gentle and perfectionist."

Have you met a perfectionist before in your life? Do you hate them? Do you think that they are sick? Nobody can step into a shoes of a perfectionist except another perfectionist. In actual fact, they hate themselves more than you hate them. Being born into the world where nothing is perfect: the people, the country, the government, the family, the school, the work and life. It is a pain to walk on every step.

Mary is a perfectionist born imperfect. She was not born with a perfect feature. Small eyes, Flat nose, small mouth containing crooked teeth. Mary wasn't born in a perfect family either. Nobody taught her how to take care of herself. In the end, the only perfect thing she was born with - eyesight, became imperfect. Her skin are dull and full of scars, figure is off.

Mary believe a perfectionist, is willing to spend, at all cost, to buy perfection. Mary first spent $5000 just to buy straight teeth. She then spent $4500 to buy slim figure. Next, she intends to spent a few thousand buying fair smooth skin. If she has more money, she would even buy a perfect look.

The fact is, in this world, many circumstances can't be foreseen and there are still things money can't buy. There is one thing at least. Money can't buy perfect children. What if he/she turns out to be a little monster? What if she turns out to be huge and ugly? What if he turns out to be brainless? What is Mary going to do?

True satisfication comes from perfection.

Mary Thinks That History is Repeating Itself

2008-03-09T23:29:00.000-07:00

About 1 century ago, an island was discovered by a British and was named SG. Chinese from China flocked to this island to seek for a new living. Today, similiarly, we see Chinese from China flocking to this island. This caused a rapid rise in the local's population and the ratio now is about 1 PRC: 5 local.

Under the British's control, Singapore developed rapidly. Buildings, houses, road, drainage constructed and SG soon devolped into a fine country. Today, similiarly, everywhere is under construction. Sentosa, Marina, Orchard, expressways etc. Old buildings like scotts were tore down and new buildings rising everywhere one after another, Vivo follow by Ion Orchard, each claiming to be the biggest shopping centre.

In the past, other than immigrants, some chinese from china came over to SG temporary and work. Money earned were sent back to their homeland and this leads to an outflow of cash in the local market. In order to keep the money circulating within the island itself, opium den were built along places where the chinese travel to remit money. Today, similiarly, 2 Casinos were built on the same time, leading to heavy construction on the 2 places of interest in SG.

What will be the future prediction for business in SG? You know it.

Mary's Theory: Speeding Kills

2008-03-09T23:15:00.000-07:00

Mary thinks that our life span is pre-destinated and life is a journey. Therefore, how long we can live is equal to how far we can travel. When you speed, you take a shorter time to travel a same distance. With a pre-destinated distance that each individual can travel and a shorter time we take to complete this journey, our life generally shorten. This is how it works. This theory also explains why we aged faster if we face more stress in life. So according to Mary's Theory,

No of years to live = pre-destinated distance / speed(miles/year)

Pre-destinated distance is a constant, therefore, no of years to live is indirect proportional to our speed. Years decrese with increasing speed. So,

Stop Speeding, Cause Speeding Kills.

Mary's Favourite Sites

2007-12-04T00:20:00.000-08:00

Bian Bian Bian

http://sg.video.yahoo.com/video/play?vid=837632

The Power of Photoshop

http://www.chilloutzone.de/files/07051103.html

Mary went to NUS

2007-06-05T08:30:00.000-07:00

Once Mary overheard 2 young girls in Mac Donald discussing what path to choose for their future. They were from her secondary school cause both of them are wearing the digusting luminous orange T-shirt. Well, Mary really wanted to share with them her experience...

JUNIOR COLLEGE or POLYTECHNIC? Both can bring you to university. It all depends on your perference. BUT, polytechnic life was freedom. No mugging. No tuitions. No stress. Well, the first very major choice starts when you are in secondary two. Which option should you choose? Pure Science, Triple Science or Sub Science? Whether your choice is polytechnic or junior college, if you never have intention to pursue your future in the science area, CHOOSE Sub Science. WHY? Because all high schools students takes pure science. Why fight with them? You will only be trapped in the centre of the bell curve if you fight with them.

Mary have to admit she made a very wrong choice. A choice that ruin her all path she planned. A choice she regretted for life. She was one of the dumbs that had choosen the pure science stream just because pure science students looks clever. Don't be fooled by such a skeptical thinking. Mary wanted to take optometry in polytechnic but because of her wrong choice, she did not score for O'Levels. Having made the first wrong choice leads to MORE wrong choices. Junior College was out of the choice. Mary put Chemical Process Technology as her first choice because she had pure science background. Mary realized her real interest is Business when she was year 2 in the polytechnic. Damn. She lost interest in studies. Truancy, late for class, sleeping in class was wat i did for the whole of year 2. Well, Mary still did well for her exams. Being sick of Chemistry, something she never likes but do have a little talent in it, Mary swear she is never going to further her studies in Chemistry and was quite determined polytechnic will mark the end for her as a student. BUT...

Mary made it to the university and its a world top 20 university. Mary made the last minute choice of registering for a university reason was Mary was freaked out by the thoughts of joining work force. Mary tried to register for a placement in University and both NTU and NUS accepted her applications. Mary made it to the university because she is smart. Not academically smart, but Mary study smart. After first year, there was streaming again. 3 choices given: Industrial Chemistry, Food Science or Polymer. Industial chemistry is popular, follow by Food, then polymer. This time round, Mary play this game smartly. She chose polymer. But still, Mary wasn't lucky. 10 classmates of hers had the same thinking. 2 top scorer were in the same class as me. Anyway, the top student for 2005 was from Polymer. All the lecturers were amazed.

Mary have many friends who went to Junior Colleges but not many make it to the local universities. Sad to say, she is the only one in her secondary school level that made it to science faculty in NUS taking chemistry. She was also one of the girls in her secondary school to be condemn by her chemistry teacher and till now, Mary still don't understand WHY. WHY TEACHERS JUDGE STUDENTS BY LOOKS AND PERSONAL FEELINGS. THESE PEOPLE DON'T QUALIFIED TO BE A TEACHER. BEFORE YOU JUDGE PEOPLE, ASK YOURSELF, WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE.

Mary did not blame these pathetic teachers. Afterall, there are just a employee. She have to thanked that paticular teacher cos without her sacastic comments, Mary would not have the chance to display the artist part of her. A sincere thank you to her chemistry teacher in her secondary school.

IN THE NUTSHELL
Life is a game, and it depends on how you play the game and in a game, the final result is either you WIN or you LOSE.

I'm a big big girl, in the big big world its not a big big thing in NUS. But i do do know, that i do do feel, pathetic...

Lessons Learnt In Life

2007-05-04T05:16:00.000-07:00

Dear god

Please forgive Mary. Mary had been a nonsense last year. Last year was the year Mary turned 21. Mary tried to be funny by not going to school and hanging out late at night. Mary really thought that she was somebody with her little lamb but in actual fact, she is nobody at all. Mary has no achievements, no assets and many liabilities. Mary gained endless scars in her memories which made her too tired to continue the journey call life. One fine day, Mary woke up from her dream and saw reality. Reality told Mary its time to let go. Mary gave a thought on what reality told her and revise what she had done for the whole year and realized that she had learnt a big lesson in life.

This has been an expensive lesson learnt. Mary learnt that in life, she just has to be moderate. She has to accept the art of letting go. Art of letting go is to stop telling people you were once somebody. Nobody cares who you are in the past. A millionaire? A scholar? A champion? What people see is who you are now. What people look at is what you do next. In fact, life is just a handful of sand. You are the hand and life is the sand. If you grab it too loosely, you will lose them all. If you grab them too tightly, you will realize that you wouldn’t be able to gain the fullest because the capacity of your palm is the minimum when you clench it tight. Know what to grab, what to let lose and what to keep. Grab your dreams, keep on with your positive attitude and let go of your useless thoughts.

Mary also learnt another theory. That is you are who you are. You are who you are because of the things you did yesterday. And yesterday is already a cancelled cheque. Don’t waste the next 86400s of tomorrow to ask yourself what you did not do yesterday. Don’t blame the world. Don’t blame your parents. Don’t blame your ancestors. Wake up, people. The world will not change because of you. You have to change yourself to fit the world. Stop expecting government to provide you your basic needs. They are not your slaves and you have got to pay a high price for that kind of services.

Mary had realized her mistakes. Please forgive Mary.

Other Lessons Learnt in Life

1) Forgive & Forget: (By Lum)
Forget the one who hurt u & forgive urself for carelessly got hurt.

2) What goes ard, comes ard: (By Lum)
You bully others now, others will bully you in the future.

3) The art of Give & Take
He gives u something, & takes away everything.

4) Love isn't blind
Its just that u choose 2 look at the positive side of e person. If ppl can practise this in their work/life, they are 1 step ahead of being a highly effective person. Be proactive. Live life, enjoy life.

5) Faith
Faith is just what u need 2 get what u want. *It is a state of mind tt may be created by repeated instruction 2 e subconscious mind.(*Think & Grow Rich)

6) Asset VS Liability
I am my parent's present liability (spend $ on me) and future asset (earn $ for them).

7) I'm not stupid
When someone dun understand what are u teaching, say i'm stupid instead of u're stupid. Cos u are the one who dunno how 2 teach. Why did I say this? I came across a father teaching her daughter in Macdonalds. He was so loud that I couldn't concentrate on my own studies and I started observing them. The father was so impatient and spoke louder and louder. This made the child inferior and she didn't dare to say she don't understand. I just feel that such person don't fit to be a father. What is worse? He told her daughter you will win if you are louder then others. I was disappointed and I really feel like giving the father 1 tight slap. Really...

8) Time = Money
Yi cun guang yin yi chun jin, chun jin nan mai chun guang yin

9) Mix with the Right Group
Mix with the people who drives, you will drive.

10) Think with ur Brain, nt Heart
Don't let feeling affect u while u are thinking, especially in relationship.

11) What you Focus Expands
Don't assume when something don't happen on you, that incident does not exist. Things expand only when u focus on them. Example when you start to look at cars, maybe BMW, you will find the streets filled with BMW. Sad to say, those are other's. Don't just envy, Work hard for yours.

12) Power of Focus
Only with a magnifying glass then you can use Sunlight to light things up.

13) Need VS Want
A mature person do what he NEEDs to do & not what he WANTs to do.

14)Kindness in not equal Weakness (By Humphery)
Don't take my kindness as my weakness. Once I lost trust in you, I will nv believe u again.

Mary = Cinderella

2007-03-24T06:52:00.000-07:00

Mary thinks that she is Cinderella. Why? What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of Cinderella. Pumpkin? Fairy godmother? Step-mother? Step-sister?

Mary has 2 sisters which she never regard as sisters. Just someone who rents the apartment. One is 27 this year, and one is 23 this year. Mary stays in the same room with the 23 year sister. Mary have been enduring her pettiness since young. The elder has her own room since young and wasn't too close with them. 1 fine day, because of mobile phone issue, they quarrelled again. Having enough of all her rubbish, Mary stop talking to her sister. Slowly, the 2 of them (23 & 27)allied against her. Backstabbing her thinking Mary did not know anything. Childish.

23 shared the same PC with Mary. Being petty cum childish, 23 backup her own file and format the PC. With the help of her scandal, 23 locked the PC. Well, thanks to her GOOD deed, Mary's mum bought her a laptop. And again, she was seriously jealous. 23 graduated from polytechnic year 2004. For the first 3 mths, she worked in a field not related to her studies. After quitting this part time job, she went jobless for another year. She stayed home gaming, living on my mother's money. Its only the start of 2006 she looked for a job. And everyday after work, she gamed. Without fail, everyday. No thoughts of upgrading. Hopeless. Whats worst? Dinner is served right to the room. YA, she had dinner INSIDE the bedroom. Fed up of all the ants, Mary bought ant killer stuff from the supermarket. On the back, it wrote, Kill the ants right from the source. SOURCE. HER SISTER. Mary think of buying rat killer instead. Mary had a set of bedroom set. Mary decide to get rid of this set of furniture cos 50% of the drawers were stuffed with 23's rubbish. Mary wants a corner of her own. Sold the furniture at Yahoo Auction, Mary divide her room into 2 with different paint color with the help of her 2 buddy, Lex and Jie Yuan. They were really good helpers.

27 graduated with a degree in social science. With her useless degree, she couldn't find a proper job for 1 whole year. So she took up teaching. She actually wasted my mum's $18k. She became a teacher. A teacher in high school. What a shame. She dun fit to be a teacher at all. Imagine when her students saw her true self. Someone who treat parent as invisible. Dress up, slam the door, and off she goes. Don't even bother to open her golden mouth to say where she is going. Imagine her student knows she treat her sister like enemy. SHAME. She teach for the sake of money. Not passion. I never regard these people as teachers. What is worse? For the past 27 years, she never wash her own clothes before. That includes undergarments.

Healthy social life starts from home. Many people are generous with their friends when they are outside but when they reach home, they give their family, those who love them the most, a face.

Mary is very sad. Why did her friend treat her mum better then her very old flesh and blood sisters. Someone is felt worst den Mary. Her mum. Her heart aches when she saw her own daughters not happy with 1 another. Mary don't wish to do that. Mary did tried to start a conversation with them. But the 2 childish girls, just cant think. Why can't they just act in front of their parents to make them happy?

Happy Family? Its just a childhood game of 4... Maybe happy family can only have 4. I am the odd one out...

Mary's Affinity with Autistic Kids

2007-03-08T09:29:00.000-08:00

Mary only like kids that are cute. A few years back, Mary was asked to help out for a kindergarden graduation ceremony in a church hall.

At the Kindergarden

Mary meet up with her friend at a little childcare & kindergarden located at near Fahjar LRT station. Mary sat on a children stool while waiting. She noticed somebody pulling her sleeves but when she turns around, she found no one. Its only during the third time Mary saw the "culprit". A shy little boy. This little boy led her to the front of the television. It was showing Mr Bean cartoon. The little boy pull her fingers, wanting her to sit down. Mary sat down on the floor with her legs crossed. This little boy sat beside her, leaning his arms comfortable on her lap. Mary didn't notice anything weird. After awhile, this little boy climb onto her lap and they watched Mr Bean cartoon together. After a while, Mary's friend walked over to her with a puzzled look. She told Mary that this is not a normal child. He is an autistic. Mary was pretty surprised. His name is Tendious. Not only my friend was surprised, all the caretakers in the kindergarden was surprised.

One of the care takers switched off the TV and gathered the kids. Tendious wasn't keen and started crying and ran around while they tried to carry him up. Mary friend told her that nobody is able to carry this boy up peacefully. He was running away from the caretaker when Mary picked him up. He stopped crying. After that, Mary become the in-charge for this little boy.

Mary is inexperience with kids. Tendious actually picked up his shoes, wore it, and step out of the kindergarden. He seems to hate the place because he dashed the moment he stepped out of the place. Mary managed to carry him back. Because Autistic children don't talk, Mary have to observe the little boy to understand him.

At the Church
On the bus, Tendious was sitting on Mary's lap. One of the caretaker was passing cuttlefish around. Mary offered Tendious and Tendious pushed Mary's hand away. Her friend told her this is the way autistic children do rejections. Before that piece of cuttlefish went into Mary's mouth, she double checked with her friend will she be rejected if she eat the cuttlefish. The answer is no.

Mary's friend told her that this little boy remembers things he like very well. She told Mary Tendious like the playground in the church. And true, Tendious lead Mary to the playground which was a distance away from the entrance they moment they step off the bus.

At the hall, the other children was preparing while Tendious sat aside, playing with his favourite puzzle. Tendious wanted a toy car but another child was playing with it. Tendious grab Mary's hand towards the toy car, wanting Mary to get for him. Mary did not know what to do cos it is wrong to snatch. Mary remembered she didn't manage to get the car for him.

Its time to change! Mary's friend challenged her. If she is able to change Tendious clothes, today lunch is on her. Well, Mary have no experience, but she gave it a try. She took his bob-dog t-shirt and shover it infront of tendious. No reaction. Then Mary lifted tendious t-shirt once. No reaction again. Mary did that again. This time round, Tendious lift up both his arms and Mary took off his t-shirt and dressed up for him. Her friend was impressed. And Mary show a proud face. Because Mary did not know how to change diapers, so she left it for the seniors to do it. Phew, free lunch!

After the performance, tendious returned to his mum. Mary stood behind them. A sudden saddness. Mary never have maternal feeling until she met tendious. After everything ended, they left the place. Tendious was sent to special school. After that day, Mary did not get to see him anymore. No news at all. I do hope one day I can see him again. Tendious, you are someone special to me. I miss you.

Mary Have All Wisdom Tooth

2007-02-01T06:11:00.000-08:00

Mary went for her 2nd wisdom tooth operation this evening. Mary was freaked out by her thoughts 2 days back due to her previous experience in wisdom tooth extraction.

Back in 2001, after o'levels. An X ray revealed a hidden tooth inside Mary's Gum. Instead of growing vertically out, this tooth actually grows horizontally. For those who had never came across such incident, this is actually more common in girls as they have smaller mouth and I'm 1 of them.

Mary don't like that dentist she always go at Jurong East. She has got a "own her 1 million dollar face". So, Mary went for other dentist. Mary can't recall how she got to know this specialist at Jurong Point. Might be because she working there that time. Professional, of cos charge a professional price. $780. This is a very interesting experience Mary would like to share. Mary's mum accompanied her there and she was actually invited inside the surgery room to view the whole process. And what so fantastic? Mary's eye wasn't covered up at all. She was viewing too! Looking at the big syringe inserting into her mouth. Watching her blood being suck away. Yum Yum. And whats more! She removed the whole wisdom tooth nicely out. Its still with her now. The doctor is so cool. Mary could only remember she is a ang mo. Mary got no idea how she looks like. What is that thing that freak Mary out? PAIN. Pain after the anesthesia wears off. Mary wanted to change a new gauze but couldn't replace the new gauze back nicely. Mary gave up. She sat on bed, pull a t-shirt from near by, open her mouth and let the blood and saliva flow out. What happens next she had no idea. Mary only remembered she went back Jurong Point that night. Went there to eat ice cream! Anderson's Ice Cream. The pain and swelling lasted less then 12 hours.

Things were going on well until 1 fine day, Mary noticed something growing out from the right side of the empty gum. SHIT. Not again. Ya, again. Wisdom tooth, again. And whats worst? It a lazy tooth again. Its lying down again. This time, an exposed tooth gave more problem. Mary tried to avoid another operation but wasn't that lucky. Becos of the gap, food got trap and soon, a big hole evolved. And the tooth was pushing. This tightens the gap inbetween the teeth at the front. Mary don't know who to look. Which dental should she go?

One fine Sunday, Christmas day. Mary met up with her friend. So happen that this friend of hers has a sister who is a dentist. Mary checked the prices through her friend. Mary waited till end of January before she made the appointment. Delay was nothing but becos Mary does not have the courage to go for the 2nd operation. Mary went for a checkup. She wonders how her friend's sister look like while she was waiting outside. The first question pop into her mind when she saw her. "Are you sure you are his sister? How could he have such a sweet looking sister. So different from him. He is so suai(this word is nth good when transleted in english)!!"

2nd Operation was set on the 1st of February. Had a Sake Sushi dinner before she went. Ya, Mary was alone. Her little lamb couldn't go cos no pets allow on bus. This time round the procedures are abit different. Mary was not allow to look cos was blind folded throughout the operation. This 2nd operation, the tooth was cut into smaller pieces. Mary was very calm. The dentist was asking again and again, you still alright? After the operation, dentist commented Mary was cool. haha. Mary think the one who is doing is operation is more cool.

Mary felt like crying the moment she left the room. No, there are no pain. Mary felt pathetic cos she was alone. Reminds her of the First Aid competition 6-7 years ago. Lets not talk about this here. After payment, Mary went over to Tiong Bahru Plaza and bought her favoutite ice cream. 750ml tub Venezia gelato. Mary's favourite flavour: Dark Chocolate and Tartufo. Yum Yum. Mary took a train home. Cos Mary don't want to be alone. Taking a cab is lonely. Pain starts when the train was at clementi.

This time round, Mary knows how to fight with the pain. The moment Mary reached home, she used a face towel and wrapped some ice with it. This towel sticked to Mary's face for the next 3 hours. Technical term this is known as cold compression. This reduces swelling. But Mary used this method to numb the area. A very good method. Pain killer don't work. Out of the 20 painkillers given by the dentist, Mary only too 2. The bad part of the 2nd operation was that the antibiotic sucks. Mary got chocked twice by the antibiotic which is in tablet form instead of the usual capsule form. It dissolves rapidly in water and Mary can't glup it down fast enough cos she can't stretch my mouth big enough to hold more water.

Looking at the bright side, wisdom tooth operation gave Mary a chance for to eat expensive ice cream!

*To people looking for dentist, especially guys, go to that clinic. Even the nurses are pretty. No bluff. Sweet and Pretty dentist you got to specify Dr Lum. = ) Brightsmile, #01-05 at the building opposite Tiong Bahru Plaza.

*I am straight. Only haircut will I go for Male hairdresser. I preferred females for the rest of the portion concerning my body.

History...

2007-01-26T07:03:00.000-08:00

Lets start off with a bit of history and self introduction about myself. Born in Year 1985, in a small hospital in Singapore. I am the 3rd child of the Tan family and a disappointment to the Tan family. They wanted a boy. I am suppose to be a boy but was a girl when i was pushed out from mummy lamb. How would you feel if you disappoint your family the day you were born?

I follow the wonderful education system and step into the Kindergarden at 5. Continue my primary school education with Princess Elizabeth Primary School at 7, secondary school education with Jurongville Secondary School at 13 and tertiary school education in Singapore Polytechnic at 17. I thought everything will end here, but sad to say, I ended up in NUS. Yuck.

Why Mary Wants A Little Lamb? First thing first. My name is not Mary. It just does not have meaning. This Lamb is actually a vespa. Mary owns a Class 2B licence. Lame Mary wants a little lamb. Given a second chance, Mary will still go for a class 2B licence. Mary is going for Class 3 Licence soon. Mary eyeing a bigger lamb. Yum Yum.

At Home...

Solemn chap.

In School...

I put on a mask before I leave house. Joker in school, trying to lighten the stress of the competitive NUS mates. Happy go Lucky person in school. Gives a never care less attitude. People around me thinks that I am lazy. Well...

At Work...

I am very serious chap when i doing work. Not many people get to see it cos I do serious things at home. Those who saw it knows it. I will scream at you or gives you a third finger if things are not up to standard, no matter WHO YOU ARE. Tend to talk to myself. Will praise myself if I get something right.

Shopping...

I shop for ideas. I look at shops interiors. I look for trends how people set up shops.

I am a weirdo. A unique kind.

To Be Continue...